D4 residents in Uri Gellar bent spoon row

Irate D4 residents voiced their anger today at Uri Gellar in what they described as an unprovoked attack on cutlery in the posh Dublin suburb.

Thousands of phone calls jammed the lines of radio stations as residents complained to anyone who would listen - Joe Duffy - at the visit to Lansdowne Road yesterday of Uri Gellar, the famous Israeli spoon bender turned good vibes and positive thinking guru.

Gellar visited the Old stadium yesterday to spread some good vibes and positive thinking in a bid to assist a hapless Irish soccer team to victory over the watching making country of Switzerland.

Speaking to anyone who would listen - crap RTE programmes - Gellar urged the Irish people to put their hands together and shout "win Ireland, win".

He did offer some health and safety precautions to those driving vehicles and said maybe drivers should only take one hand off the wheel and touch the radio and say the chant. We don’t want anyone to crash during the chanting as that would only spread bad vibes.

However, Gellars good intentions towards the Irish football team cut no ice with the perennially angry, moany residents of Ballsbridge and its environs.

One angry caller to a radio show complained: "Gellar’s just a menace to decent residents. He says he doesn’t bend spoons anymore, but, that’s clearly a lie.

"The silver spoon that was in my mouth when I was born and which is the centre piece on my sideboard display is bent out of all proportion," said Ms Mona Lott.

"He should be trying to help Israel qualify anyway. And what’s this I hear about him going to be flying around in a helicopter in a bid to send positive thoughts to the Irish team. What’s going to happen to the rotor blades on the helicopter?" she asked.

Local hardware stores in the D4 area have reported a big increase in lead sales as residents attempt to protect their cutlery from Gellars amazing powers.

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Did the Ira really kill Joe Rafferty?

The simple answer is no. Despite current speculation that Rafferty was gunned down outside his home in Ongar west Dublin last April by an Ira hit man, the Ira didn’t murder Rafferty.

The gunman himself could well have been involved in the Ira - indeed, it was confirmed to The Irish Times that the only suspect in the case was in the Ira and still has strong links to the organisation - but that still doesn’t make the hit an Ira one.

The story doing the rounds at the moment and one that is being particularly promoted by Rafferty’s sister, Esther Uzell, is that Rafferty got into a dispute with some men from the same family from the Ringsend area of Dublin’s south-inner city where he is originally from.

The dispute had its roots in a fight at a party in the south inner city last October at which three brothers from the area assaulted two young members of Rafferty's family. I understand that those family members were female.

Rafferty bumped into one of the brothers on the street the next day and - this is speculation on my part, but it seems logical - Rafferty dished a out a couple of slaps. There followed a number of incidents involving attacks on property owned by the Rafferty family.

Rafferty was also told a number of times by members of the family he had clashed with that he would be "got" by the IRA.

The mother of the brothers that Rafferty got into dispute with is in a relationship with the only suspect in the case, the former Ira man.

What puzzles me here is why would Rafferty be told he’d be "got"? Why not just "get him"?

And then there’s the big question. Why would a former Ira man go to all the bother of assassinating Rafferty - remember this murder was meticulously planned - over what was probably a couple of slaps? To impress his new mot? To stand up for guys who aren’t his sons?

It appears that before the killing Esther Uzell had gone to local SF councillor Daithi Doolin to tell him of the threats to her brother Joe. From what I can gather, she didn’t go to the gardai to tell them. Why? Did she have something to fear by going to the gardai?

Uzell now wants SF to put pressure on the suspect to come forward, but both Doolin and the leader of Sinn Féin's council representatives, Christy Burke, have said the suspect is not in the Ira and that SF have no influence on him. They say they can’t confirm whether he was previously in the Ira as "the Ira don’t say who their members were and are".

But, since when have SF not had any influence in Dublin’s inner city?

Was Rafferty shot for something more than just a few slaps? Something criminal perhaps that SF don’t want to get involved in? Uzell herself has been quoted in the Northside people as saying the brothers are running around Ringsend selling drugs and still threatening her family to drop their campaign.

If the truth is to be found in Uzell’s determination to have her brother’s killer bought to justice and that her version of events bears out to be accurate, the what’s the point in having SF in inner city areas where a lot of former Ira men enjoy the criminal life.

However, if her brother - or some other family member - was involved in some shady dealings that went pear shaped and inevitably led to the killing, she should leave well alone.

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There are some things money can't buy - for everything else there's Fianna Fail

Overpriced land for new prison - 30 million

MIT Europe Fiasco - 40 million

An electronic voting system that can't be used - 52 million

A payroll system that pays staff 1 million a month - 160 million

Having a government that blows our cash - Priceless

There are some things money can't buy - for everything else there's Fianna Fail - Courtesy of Spudnik's wife

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